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What Nose?

December 7, 2018

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Good riddance to this chump. He and his co-workers have been on my roof for several days. They’ve been using it as a platform to render and paint the neighbouring building. I asked them not to walk on my old and fragile roof.

‘We’re not walking on the roof!’ replies the boss prick.

‘I’ve just seen you,’ I reply. ‘The roof is very old and half of it is just tin without structural support. You can fall through.’

The boss prick ignores me.

‘I’ve been very accommodating,’ I remind him.

Previously, the pricks had their ramshackle ‘scaffolding’ on my roof and huge scaffolding poles lying in my backyard for several weeks. I’ve endeavoured to be a good neighbour and help them out but neighbourliness is a one-way street with this lot. The boss prick has promised to modify his gutters with a side guard and gum leaf guard to protect my property from water damage. Previously, the house had gutters hanging over my property, rusted out and jammed with gum leaves, pouring water into my back garden — a nightmare in this moisture-loving termite zone.

‘When are you going to put the guards in your gutters?’ I ask.

The boss prick replies, ‘If I say I’ll do something, I’ll do it.’

It’s a bit like how he never walks on my roof. No modifications have been made to the gutters. I know it would be a very different interaction if I were a man. The boss prick would be more wary and respectful and perhaps I might be tempted to punch him on the nose. In all fairness, I could then swear on a Bible that no one punched him on the nose. ‘What nose? I don’t even see a nose on your face?’

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